Some decisions require a lot of thought – weighing the pros and cons and striving to achieve the best possible result. But some people are undecided about just about anything, big or small. Whether you’re dealing with an ambivalent person or you are an ambivalent person yourself, you know it can be annoying.
But according to a new study done in British Journal of Social Psychology‘Ambivalence may not be the negative quality we think it is. in the an article for psychology today, Dr. Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Professor Emeritus of Psychology and Brain Sciences at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, sheds additional light on the potential benefits of ambivalence, as well as a downside. Here’s what you should know.
How to use your ambivalence to your advantage
Basically, what matters is that ambivalent people take the time to consider the different sides of an issue, which can lead them to make more informed decisions. Whitbourne gives the example of a visit to a restaurant with a certain family member who takes forever to order and gets on everyone’s nerves (including the waiters). Here is she takes:
Weighing factors like healthy choices, price, and method of preparation can ultimately lead to better choices than rushing to get what’s first on your list of possible entrees. How many times have you been disappointed when your own main course arrives and realized you made the wrong choice by being too hasty?
The downside of ambivalence
Aside from things taking a long time, there’s another negative aspect of ambivalence, says Whitbourne:
A quick decision can be the mental equivalent of pulling the bandage off a wound without hesitation. It can be painful, but you are through. In chronically ambivalent people, the inability to resolve conflict can lead to tension, worry, and an overall negative state of mind.
G / O Media can receive a commission
So keep that in mind the next time you’re in a situation where someone is particularly undecided (including yourself).
