This week covers the full spectrum of children’s internet culture, from Britney Spears stuck in a conservatory to a movie about a family stuck next to the ultimate Karen to a TikTok lady stuck in her own Chair stuck. Let’s dive in – here’s what you need to know.
This Week In Supreme Court Rulings: Teenage Cheerleaders Confirmed
I don’t usually cover Supreme Court decisions, but this case features an angry teenage cheerleader, vulgar Snapchat news, and a school district petty enough to bring a disciplinary matter to the Supreme Court. Troubles began back in 2017 when Brandi Levy, then a high school student in Pennsylvania, wasn’t promoted to college cheer.
Annoyed, the teen posted on her SnapChat: “Fuck School Fuck Softball Fuck Cheer Fuck Everything” and the school responded by cutting her from the cheer team. Her parents filed suit, arguing that she was out of school when she cursed on the internet and maybe school should stop being such fascists.
The case moved from the Pennsylvania District Court up the right pyramid to the Big Show – the Supremes. In a win for Free Speech and The Cheeristocracy, the court ruled 8: 1 that Mahanoy School District is violating Ms. Levi’s First Amendment rights by disciplining her for off-campus speech (and maybe they shouldn’t be such fascists). It’s not a total victory, however: the court secured itself by allowing there to be circumstances where speaking off campus could be a cause for school discipline.
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This Week In Life Hacks: Free T-Shirts At Disneyland?
I don’t usually cover beat-the-system hacks, but this one features a TikTok influencer, underboobs, and free Disney swag. Disney fan Amanda DiMeo recently posted a video describing a brilliant but completely unethical way to get a free Disneyland t-shirt.
“If you’re wearing a shirt that shows a small underbust, they’ll write you a ticket so you can get a free shirt at the nearest souvenir shop,” DiMeo said in a video while showing off the $ 75 shirt.
While many of their commentators vowed to try the hack, other Disney fans weren’t happy at all. “Please don’t abuse this,” wrote one commentator. “You just pull the function and send people back to change.”
Disney has not commented yet, but its website states it reserves the right to refuse entry to anyone who wears clothing that “exposes excessive skin that may be considered inappropriate for a family environment”. I don’t know if it works on underbust hairy men, but I’m going to Anaheim to find out.
This week in music: Britney fights for freedom
I don’t usually cover conservatory hearings, but this one features an imprisoned pop star fighting her own father and a longstanding online hashtag campaign.
In 2008, Britney Spears’ father, James, gained control of her money and herself after apparently struggling with mental health problems and drug use. This arrangement led to speculation by fans that the withdrawn pop star was being held against their will. Britney has now confirmed the rumors.
Spears called a Los Angeles trial Wednesday to claim she was drugged, forced to work against her will, and prevented from conceiving because of her father’s legal control over her life and she wants it to end. “I just want my life back,” Spears told the court, adding, “I’m not happy. I can not sleep. I’m so mad it’s crazy … I really believe these conservatories are abusive. “
Hundreds of Britney supporters gathered outside the courthouse, many of whom wore “#FreeBritney” signs, and heard speeches in favor of the pop star and against abuse of the conservatory system.
Despite the ubiquity of the FreeBritney hashtag, legal experts doubt Spears will be released. “Britney said in this case that the father does more harm than good, but there are reasons why she is still a listed building.” Tamar Arminak, a lawyer who worked with Amanda Bynes’ parents on her 2014 conservatory case, told NBC. According to Arminak, the most likely outcome is the removal of Spears’ father from the conservatory and easing of conditions, but she likely won’t be left to fend for itself.
This week in TikTok activism: Black TikTok is on strike
I don’t usually cover the troubled morass of racial relations in America, but this story is about online influencers, Megan Thee Stallion, and the notorious lack of dancing skills of whites.
It started when online celebrity Addison Rae performed a series of TikTok dance moves on Jimmy Fallon’s show, without mentioning the blacks who invented the dances. Influencer Erick Louis responded by asking the Black TikTok dancers not to create any moves for Megan Thee Stallion’s new joint “Thot Shit”. In a story at least as old as Elvis Presley, Louis and Co. argue that white TikTokers appropriate their moves, get paid and don’t give credit, and they would stand around with no moves, but without black people would clap.
While the strike raises a serious problem, Videos imagine dances White people get hilarious for Thee Stallion’s song … but not as funny as that actual attempts.
Viral Videos of the Week: Trailer for Karen and Candyman
I don’t usually link to two viral videos in a single week, but I’ll make an exception to point out a couple of horror movie trailers that couldn’t be more different.
The first is the trailer for Karen, an upcoming BET-produced film in which a racist white lady named Karen moves next to a black family and lives up to her famous name. The trailer sparked a lot of internet blowback, with people saying it looks more like an SNL parody than a real movie, drawing attention to the weird whitewashed racism the trailer depicts, and digging up some actual ones far-right craziness of the actress who plays Karen is Orange Taryn Manning from New Black, whose name even rhymes with Karen.
Karen looks like a third-rate imitation of Jordan Peele, but the Peele himself is behind the upcoming horror film Candy man. The reboot of the great ’90s film was written and produced by Peele and directed by Nia DaCosta, whose directorial debut Thriller Small forestis just amazing. Candyman is due out in August, and while I haven’t seen either of the two films, I can tell you for sure that he will be better than Karen. Check out the trailer.
This week in the kink: Fetish stunt goes wrong
I don’t usually cover people who are stuck in chairs … okay, I usually cover people who are stuck in chairs. Let me tell you the story of Sydney Jo who was stuck in a chair on the internet.
Before the incident, Jo had a sleepy little TikTok posting videos about sexuality. A recent video of her was about “Stuck Fetish”. I had never heard of it either, but there seem to be people who get excited when people get stuck on or in things.
To spice up her video, Jo demonstrated with a folding chair … but she actually got stuck. Not “I’m really excited by this perverse act of getting stuck in the chair” got stuck, but “I’m going to call the fire department now because I might die” somehow got stuck.
Since this is 2021, Jo has documented that whole drama on videoincluding the arrival of the fire brigade and their attempts to free her from the folding chair. (This is not a porn build, I swear.)
The firefighters tried bolt cutters first, but that didn’t work, so they used the jaws of life to extract accident victims from mutilated cars. It did the job, freeing Jo and giving her the millions of views that content creators dream of.
Post Script: After you a. have made few media interviews, Jo seems to have deleted her TikTok account without explanation. Maybe she got stuck on a couch or something.
