In Dr. Orna Guralnik’s career is about drawing boundaries. As a psychoanalyst, in addition to the necessary space between work and private life, there are also boundaries between you and the patient in constant interplay. Combine this with hosting Showtime’s Couple’s Therapy – called “raw and tasty”From at least one prominent point of sale – and you have a pretty professional balancing act.
Dr. Guralnik’s work doesn’t stop when the cameras turn off. She still sees clients and researches when producers and directors aren’t around, and seeks ways to inform her methods by expanding her mind through reading fiction, meditating, and practicing yoga. I asked Dr. Guralnik on whether she wants to constantly switch between professional and private spheres, and the very public forum of her Showtime series, which will premiere on April 18 in the second season.
What is different about relationship counseling than talk therapy with just one client?
I became interested in working with couples because intimate love relationships (or refusal to enter into them) are such an important driver and experience for most people. Humans, in their couple, express much of who they are – from their early history of being attached to their politics and how they believe one should address differences and resolve conflicts. In solo work, much of the work is reflective and contemplative, while couples quickly act on their problems in real time rather than thinking about and talking about them. Working in couples is a good balance for my deep psychoanalytic work with individuals.
I read a lot of theory and discuss my work with colleagues to make sure I have a meaningful life outside of work.
How do you juggle the needs of consultation for a television show and with more traditional clients?
While the work itself isn’t very different, my work on the documentaries is also a great team effort as I work closely with the brilliant and talented group of directors and editors. This is a wonderful addition to my life as an analyst, which is usually much more lonely. When it comes to juggling the many demands, I work on keeping solid boundaries between different areas of my life. The preparation for the different ways of working is similar as I basically take care of my mind. I read a lot of theory and discuss my work with colleagues to make sure I have a meaningful life outside of work. I also create space to support my thoughts by reading fiction, meditating, and practicing yoga.
What would someone watching your show not see in relation to your average work day?
Being a psychoanalyst means always working to deepen and expand the mind. I belong to reading and writing groups that have been around for decades, and I write academically and take classes – just like my colleagues. And I make sure to read poetry. It’s about creating space for the unconscious to show itself.
I work on keeping firm boundaries between different areas of my life. The preparation for the different ways of working is similar as I basically take care of my mind.
How do you leave work?
Boundaries are the key to proper psychoanalytic practice – good boundaries between analyst and patient so that you don’t flood your patient with your own “stuff” and vice versa, and boundaries between the space of therapeutic work and the rest of life. At this point, most of the time, I can decide how much material to process that comes up in meetings and when it is a good idea to let go and come back to it when I have enough space.
In practice, how much does couples get when it comes to developing new means of conflict resolution, compared to yourself when you think about it?
It’s hard to part. Many spontaneous new ideas arise in meetings, but these are actually the result of a lot of behind-the-scenes work that goes on thinking, reading, and speaking with colleagues.
